Friday, July 13, 2012

The Final Dance







Strokes of peach, a blush of pink
Rose she was, he a commoner ant
This great divide made his heart sink
She was royalty, he of lowly descent

Clad in satin, in a fortress of thorns
As the winds came a laughing by
He watched her fall prey to their scorns
Their meandering trail, a sore to the eye              

But her stately gait proved no match
As she swirled across the thorny hedge
Arrogant gusts swept the flower patch
She plummeted from the window ledge


Heartbroken, he hastened to be by her side,
Broken, Of fallen petals in his arms she died.....






A Shakespearean Sonnet published by me as a part of IBL; the Battle of Blogs, sponsored by WriteupCafe.com. Join us at our official website and facebook page.


46 comments:

Disha said...

SUPERB poem...
Extremely well-written :) :) :)

Good luck Blogwati G :) :) :)

I loved the way you have used the phrase "Of fallen petals"...!!

Blogwati Gee said...

Thanks Disha......hope to make the cut :)

Dinesh Pal said...

Lovely poem.. more of romeo juliet

Blogwati Gee said...

Yes DP, all great stories are tragic...:)

Ghazala Hossain said...

My complements, for using the cue line so well and so powerfully..!

All the best :)

Rahul Bhatia said...

Best of luck for this well written sonnet:)

Vishal Kataria said...

Novel sonnet. The love between an ant and a flower petal. Never heard of it before. The end makes me cringe.

Awesome! :)

Blogwati Gee said...

Thanks Ghazala........could not have been possible without you guys :)

Blogwati Gee said...

Thanks Rahul, gonna need loads of it!

Blogwati Gee said...

Vishal....every beautiful story has a tragic ending...

Diwakar Narayan said...

Here I must agree..simple yet superb poetry. Feelings easily conveyed through use of simple words :-)

Arvind Passey said...

Well, surely here is a story with a lot of infatuation! Love this part... but remain confused about the iambs or even a consistent syllabic count.
Valiant attempt, I'd say. :)

Arvind Passey
www.passey.info

Akanksha said...

beautiful sonnet, though I have a least brain in poetry but still I can feel the emotions...All the best!

Mridula Chitnis said...

The last two lines take the cake or the crown... both actually

Chatty Wren said...

Lovely poem! a sad love story!

Sudeshna Das said...

A love story beautifully portrayed. I LOVED the last two lines!

Best wishes from Kolkata Knight Writers. :)

Punit Dubey said...

Not much into poetry, but Love what able to understand easily :)
Nice composition...

eula said...

WOW n WOW again

Devashri said...

superb poem Vinita !!!

though me have least.. can say no brains regarding poetry, but still I can feel the very emotions, they really are heart touching :)

Good Luck Blogwati G,best wishes :)

Sonia said...

Wow.. Mesmerizingly Beautiful :)

Rickie said...

This was very pretty!

JANU said...

Well done.

Shail Mohan said...

Loved it :)

Uma said...

Interesting piece.Never knew a love can be a painted this way :)

Confused Soul said...

wow.. i think that was just amazing.. very well written :D

insanebloom said...

Lovely, sad...beautiful composition.

TTT said...

b'ful sonnet !!! i could feel the emotions ...

Purba said...

Loved and lost? How could you do that to them!

Someone is Special said...

beautiful poem.. keep writing!

Someone is Special

Blogwati Gee said...

Diwakar Narayan, a compliment from a poet like you....I must have done something right :)

Blogwati Gee said...

Arvind have taken the poetic license a tad bit seriously :) thanks for dropping by

Blogwati Gee said...

Akanksha...if you can feel it, it's good enough for me.

Blogwati Gee said...

Mrids, glad you feel that way....was meant to be the same.

Blogwati Gee said...

Chatty, tried as much as I could ....could not bring myself to post a humourous one on this.

Blogwati Gee said...

Thanks a ton Sudeshna, KKW defi has a winner in hands. I loved it!

Blogwati Gee said...

Punit, in simplicity lies the beauty after all.

Blogwati Gee said...

Eula....thanks...you too generous...as usual.

Blogwati Gee said...

Devashri, thanks to the team that helped hone my skills.

Blogwati Gee said...

Soniaji, Rickie and Janu.........muchos gracias!

Blogwati Gee said...

Shail........I am glad you did....peps me up:)

Blogwati Gee said...

Uma...love is many a splendoured thing ...

Blogwati Gee said...

Confused soul......thank you so much, yet again!

Blogwati Gee said...

insanebloom, from you, this compliment makes me very happy. Loved your composition as already said that a zillion times :)

Blogwati Gee said...

TTT, wish you were one of the judges...lol...thanks!

Blogwati Gee said...

Purba, tried playing God...did not enjoy it that much....but tragedy is always more eyeball popping :)

Blogwati Gee said...

Someone is Special.....thanks so much for your wishes.

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